My Little Pony - Friendship Is Magic: Episode 515 - Rarity Investigates!

Rating:

Nobody ever said reviewing was easy, and this analysis wasn’t going to be either.  I had on my hands an episode with four writing credits, which meant the culprit could be any one of them.  A lovely femme fatale was called upon to investigate a potential crime, but I was left to pick up the pieces.  She knew right where to get me, tugged at all of my strings and used her considerable charm.  Like myself, she was into fashion, sporting some of the best clothes ever seen on My Little Pony.  With a grace and elegance none of her friends could muster, she solved her case in time for dinner, but did this style have any substance?  One of the most colorful television shows finally produced long stretches of gorgeous black and white, but was that enough for a good rating?  Only I could decide.  It was a lonely road, but one I chose long ago.  I know why I did, and what I had to do now.  Maybe I’d lose some friends, or alienate the public again, but none of that mattered.  It was just me, my typewriter, and the truth.  And I’ll be damned if I was ever going to betray any of those for anyone.

It all started when Rainbow Dash burst into Rarity’s new shop.  She was setting out her new fall line while the Pegasus boasted about being named a Wonderbolts alternate for some sort of hoo-hah going on at the palace.  Guess I missed the memo about Dash being a full member of that group.  With so many other Wonderbolts around who had no chance of flying in this show, she understandably made some enemies.  Imagine my surprise when Spitfire was suddenly called away the next day to care for her ailing mother, thus opening up a spot.  Was this a clichéd way to give Dash the chance she’s been waiting for?  Not even Meghan McCarthy’s presence could convince the characters it would be that easy.

When Spitfire’s mom showed up at practice later, Dash became the prime suspect in trying to bump off her competition.  Rarity knew as well as I do that it’s never who you think at first and set out to clear her friend’s good name.  Collecting clues suggested otherwise though, since everything she found only implicated Dash further.  Of course, she only did this between focusing on drapes, cake decorations, and prodigiously changing clothes.  Dash was exasperated, but I knew a good gumshoe’s tactics when I saw them.  Rarity geared everything toward solving the case, and did so well enough that it only took her an act.

With every suspect assembled (if you could call them that), Rarity announced the actual culprit was Wind Rider, a legendary retired Wonderbolt who was supposed to fly in the upcoming show.  Despite everyone finding this preposterous, Rarity succinctly described her method of deduction.  Dash’s hair clippings were obviously cut, the letter’s envelope smelled of his cologne, and that cake which distracted those guards originally left a stain on the buyer’s scarf.  Using a big reveal I could only dream of, Rarity untied Wind Rider’s scarf to reveal that very stain.

Incredulous, the legend soon had little choice but to admit he was behind everything.  Dash might have broken his records, so he set her up for a permanent ban.  Unfortunately, that now became his punishment as Dash miraculously retrieved Spitfire right before the show.  Chalk up another one for Shadow Spade, PI.  Oh, did I say that out loud?

Now it was my turn to gather all the suspects together.  Two I knew well (M.A. Larson, Meghan McCarthy), but the others were barely acquaintances (Joanna Lewis, Kristine Songco).  Friend, enemy, or stranger, I still had to treat each equally.  Unfortunately, more writers almost always create worse products, and this deceptively simple story absolutely qualifies as a mess.  But who deserves the praise and blame?

Rarity’s titular investigation unquestionably stood above any other part.  Not only did every black and white scene look great and perfectly capture the mood, but their use was expertly done.  Black and white only appeared when Rarity was sleuthing, and she snapped out of it when anyone interrupted her.  And as stated in the teaser, Rarity’s wide range of outfits were uniformly excellent, whether it was the period appropriate long dresses with a hat or that almost skimpy outfit and veil.  Rarity clearly had fun getting into character, and her spirit lifted an episode which otherwise couldn’t match it.  Was this notorious old movie lover M.A. Larson’s contribution?

Deducing McCarthy’s input proved much easier.  Retcon villain?  “That was easy” solution?  Check and check.  While Wind Rider’s function wasn’t obvious at first, his introduction only served to absolve any actual characters of blame.  The first older Wonderbolt could have explored their history or how Equestria handles retired superstars, but instead he’s an asshole who probably got his records through cheating.  Given another opportunity to mention how certain other real life sports stars have done so, Dash and Soren reference some Wonderbolt “way” and give him the boot.  That might be ideal, but Wind Rider is actually right.  Then he reveals Spitfire flew toward some faraway mountains which will be impossible to reach from before the show.  Fifteen seconds later, Dash returns with Spitfire.  That was (oh why the fuck do I even bother anymore).

Lewis and Songco were tasked with fitting these disparate parts into a coherent story, which did at least happen.  But Rainbow Dash and Rarity feel too different for their script to actually gel.  Dash is both a disaster who destroys Rarity’s new display in the teaser, and a daft idiot who has no faith in her friend when everyone else assumed she was guilty.  We can tell Rarity has met someone “important” at the party, but Dash ruins their natural encounter by spouting pointless exposition.  She also stains Rarity’s dress, pouts or looks disinterested throughout, and offers no defense of a crime she knows she didn’t commit.  Rainbow Dash’s one positive act occurs off-screen and was only possible through script contrivance.  So what point did Dash have being in this episode?  From suddenly now being a Wonderbolt to acting like shit toward everyone else, Dash’s character was dreadful.

Rarity fared better in the aforementioned parts, but she also had questionable moments.  After Dash leaves her shop, a delivery pony brings jewels which were not what she ordered.  Turning on that feminine charm, she flirts with this pony until he agrees to return them that day.  This section has no bearing on the plot at all, and oddly finds Rarity using sex as a weapon.  She’s done it before, but the scene is still filler and should have been cut.  Having Sassy Saddles reappear made little sense since she was completely dropped from the story afterwards.

So what was one reviewer to do?  Should I accept the complicated story that this was a mishmash of dissimilar writers who couldn’t be bothered to expand their slight ideas into one decent script?  Or the simpler one of a fun “who-dun-it” with some good memorable moments?  Even though I know the former is true, I find myself still provisionally choosing the latter.  Rarity’s detective scenes are too entertaining and well done not to recommend, and the mystery seemed interesting despite its unsatisfying conclusion.  But there’s no hiding how everything around this felt much worse.  I guess we’ll never know for sure who was responsible, but nobody can solve every case.  I’m fairly confident I know what happened here, and sometimes nothing else brings any comfort.  Perhaps my rating is too charitable, or maybe you think I’m being overly harsh.  Considering what actually happened, everyone involved should feel lucky they’re getting off easy.  And for me, I know the next case will be right around the corner.  This may not have been my best detective work either, but that just makes me hungrier for the next time.  As long as there are shows to review and I keep getting up every day, I’ll be there, ready for whatever awaits.